cannot imagine the implication of failing anything... you know what i'm talking about.... sigh... it determines what the rest of life is going to be like.....

y is maia voted out????!! i like her so much!! she's my favourite idol!!!!!!

argh... some singaporeans simply have no brains.... ppl who voted didnt voted correctly... ppl who really wanna vote for the best didnt do so because of the 50 cents per call fact... poor maia.... so gonna miss her performances in singapore idol....

ah.. if anyone still have doubts about whether JC will be a good choice, let me tell you, JC may be fun and exciting to those who can find time to enjoy, but i'm sure no JC students will ever tell you it's not stressful. Until now, i'm still doubting my choice about being in a JC. Do i really have the capabilities? A Levels is approaching -- i'm taking chemistry practical in 9 days time for goodness sake! (kill me) When will my misery end?

Read Joel's blog just now, and thought that what Benny said is indeed very true. I'm never a person very good at words (my friends thought that i have an amusing way of describing things), and i believe it's near impossible for me to type out a whole (pro english) post on how i'm feeling right now. In short, Jc is very demanding. Make the right choice. Now i wished i went to a poly...

jus uploaded te graduation day photos onto a webby.. the link can be found on the left hand side of the blog... don't worry about the password to enter... erm.. if you guys had difficulty viewing the photos previously cos they asked for a password, dun worry.. cos i edited it and removed the password... actually i didnt even noe i put the password there... well.. hope this time round it all goes well... enjoy!!

to think that a few months back, i felt so sad cos i'll be missing the band.... now i'm so gonna miss the school...

today is the graduation day for us J2s... it's a fun/happie/sad day... fun because i really enjoyed myself while taking tons and tons of photos... =) happie because i saw all my friends, and it feels like we are all back to march last yr... sad because we're leaving the sch....

i cried.

it's so sad to hear all the ppl around you saying that they miss you so much.... it's so heartwarming as well... especially the teachers... they say that we're their pioneer batch of students in mjc... and they really cherish us and miss us... it'll be so different... some say it's not about taking the next batch of J1s next yr and move on life... instead, look back at the memories we once had together... it's not easy to forget us... they are really very sweet....

first, we sang the college anthem... the very first and probably the last time we're singing it...

we proceeded to the lecture theatre 4... where we had our guaduating ceremony...

first, ms lai gave a short speech... she spoke from her heart... she say we're the very first batch of meridians... and she is really very happie to have all of us as her students... that was really sweet!


it followed by the days of 2003... where all of us are running about in the school in all kinds of secondary school uniform... it is a video thingy... very cool... it started with -----
mrs chong showed us some powerpoint stuff... it was really funny.. hee... she later say that she is not veri good at words.. so she would rather not give a speech... she also say that the best thing she gave us for graduation is our testimonials... she spent alot of time on it... i really appreciated it...

miss lim (hs) sang us a song she composed herself... she got us all teary... she said "there are 2 hardest decisions she faced in her life so far... one is to leave her old sch and come to mjc... second is to give up being our civics tutor." my god... almost everybody is crying by now... as she sang the son, she cried... how sad...

mrs lim came in and gave us each a test-tube filled with coloured water and words of wisdom... she made it herself... we're so touched!! she say that we're her best batch of students, and she will never forget us... the times spent with our class is really very memorable... when she finish giving out the test-tubes, she looked away and wiped her tears quietly... it's really very sad to see teachers crying...

we then proceeded to the canteen to have a drink with mrs chong... she treated us all drinks... =) so nice...

all of them left by wishing us all the best in our A's... hope we won't disappoint them...

last of all, i wanna say a veri big thank you to all the ppl who know me in one way or another... and also, teachers and friends, I LOVE YOU!! miss ya!!!!

the J1s had so much fun this morning.... or at least they sounded like they were... all of them were screaming away... u can't help wondering what's happening outside when you hear screams from inside the lecture theatre... brought me back to memories of last yr when we played some lame games... didn't have as much fun as them this yr though...

time really flies... tmr will be the 2nd last day i'll be officially dressed in full school uniform for official lessons... (not counting A'levels)...... sigh... wonder how i'll feel on fri... graduation... i feel too young and too fast for graduation....

today during lecture, lynn turned to me and said "you noe what? i dreamt i had one day with my mum..."

there were moments of silence...

i told her not to continue... or if she was even going to... cos if she do, i'm gonna cry....

there is no cure for missing someone... especially if that person is no longer around... soon.. it'll become part of our memory... just like what it had already been.. and you will be surprise how the little things can trigger the thoughts....

like purple car.... daisies........

no more australia in december.... guess it's better to work before going.... sigh....perhaps it's time i start planning for my future too..... don't u tink so?

oh ya... i found my ans... the only way to regain my confidence, is to open up again... well... so far dat's the best answer to my question to: i've no idea how to gain back my confidence, after i last lost it in the battle... yea.... if worrying and being nervous doesn't help a single bit to achieving what i want to do, den y be?

3 weeks.... 3 weeks is all i have left.... i just gotta cross the obstacle in my heart and my mind.... i will be able to.....

Why Can't I? - by Liz Phair

Get a load of me, get a load of you
Walkin' down the street, and I hardly know you
It's just like we were meant to be

Holding hands with you, and we're out at night
Got a girlfriend, you say it isn't right
And I've got someone waiting too

This is, this is just the beginning
We're already wet, and we're gonna go swimming

Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you
Why can't I speak whenever I talk about you
It's inevitable, it's a fact that we're gonna get down to it
So tell me
Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you

Isn't this the best part of breakin' up
Finding someone else you can't get enough of
Someone who wants to be with you too

It's an itch we know we are gonna scratch
Gonna take a while for this egg to hatch
But wouldn't it be beautiful

Here we are, we're at the beginning
We haven't ****** yet, but more heads spinning

Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you
Why can't I speak whenever I talk about you
It's inevitable, it's a fact that we're gonna get down to it
So tell me
Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you

I'd love for you to make me wonder
Where it's goin'
I'd love for you to pull me under
Somethin's growin'
for this that we can control
Baby I am dyin'

Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you
Why can't I speak whenever I talk about you

Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you
Why can't I speak whenever I talk about you
It's inevitable, it's a fact that we're gonna get down to it
So tell me
Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you

a short update as to what happened to me in the past one week...

mon - lectures, wild wild wet, home.
tue - lectures, home.
wed - lectures, home.
thurs - lectures, mac, home.
fri - lectures, home.

look at that... honestly, how interesting can life get? well... maybe except for the fact that i spent the whole afternoon in wild wild wet... wild wild wet was very super ultra fun.. =) the thing itself isn't as fun as i thought it would be.. super little rides.. one of it we even have to push ourselves to get moving... kw got stuck in the tube slide... i was after him... n i banged into him... after i pushed him down, i got stuck.... argh.. hahaa... it was fun after all la... went to this 'ular lah' place where the ride is sat wif 5 other ppl in the same float... we sat it for more then 10 times... can't help it.. haha.. it's the most enjoyable ride... =) once, the stupid life guard go push this miserable me down the slide in this float meant for 6 ppl... hahaa.... n as usual, the rest of them were laughing their heads off... but i gotta admit it was fun.. hahaa.... backed out for this 'slide up' thingy... cant get my butt moving... my legs were already wobbly when i was up there... shouldn't had looked down... hahaa... yea... all the other rides were fun! or rather, we made it fun.. hahaa... if i were to go with a bunch of quiet ppl, the place would had been chao boring... =P took tons of photos... kw have this waterproof camera.. it was awesome!! darn tired after dat... looked like a lobster... nearly had skin which come peeling off my body... aches everywhere... think the fatigue is still lasting... haha... i'm still very tired...

super worried for A's.. everybody kept saying that A's would be ok... i can't help feeling i can't finish the syllabus in time... aye....

wanna wish all J1s all the best for their promos! well.. dat's all i can say about sch stuff i guess... like wat my nick says "sEreNa^ -- i've no idea how to gain back my confidence, after i last lost it in the battle..." i tink it's really very very true.. cant stand it anymore..... sch really sux... erm.. but surprisingly, i'm looking forward to GP remedial... dunno y oso... while ppl blog about how fantastic their results are, and how much they had improved, and how bad they had done in their prelims despite getting B, C & D... *sigh* i've nothing to say about mine.. (speechless)(stunned) *sigh again*

watched windstruck again at lynn & jill's house... cried again.. totally turned it into a whole emotional drama...

finally bought the heels i wanted so much.. haha... happie for that... but no happie enough to cover watever i'm going through now.....

mrs lim bought kit kat for us *awww.. how sweet* haha... yea.. she is very motherly.. we're all her kids.. =P

red and yellow and pink and green, purple and orange and blue... i can sing a rainbow, sing a rainbow, sing a rainbow too...
yea.. the sq one is now thinking about going to australia... simply because australia is so much cheaper then england... hahaa... not sure yet though... we're just saying our dream... dream to go travelling with friends... well.. whether it will come through, it all have to depend...

still, i wanna end with only one last thing i can think of...that is.....
i've no idea how to gain back my confidence, after i last lost it in the battle...